I’m not sleeping well. I toss and turn and sleep pretty much like a rotisserie chicken, constantly switching from one side to the other. I’ve tried sleeping on my stomach, but the bed pushes my stomach back into me, and that’s not comfortable. Because of this, I need longer hours of sleep, but I don’t get full, restful sleep—just lots of one-hour chunks. This has its own consequences, such as sleep headaches and broken schedules. I even try to do these mental gymnastics inside my head, figuratively closing mental windows to prevent outside thoughts from coming in, trying to declutter imaginary refuse from the day to clean up my mental landscape, and even further, trying to access the “control panel” of my mind in order to shut off systems and engage sleep protocols.
Sometimes I won’t sleep well unless I am absolutely physically exhausted. Only then does it seem like I can sleep all night. My broken sleep patterns also leave me groggier throughout the day, which has me relying on caffeinated energy drinks often. The constant cycle of poor sleep and caffeine reliance is exhausting and doesn’t help my overall health. I know I need to break this cycle, but it feels like an uphill battle.
Poor sleep is especially problematic for truckers. The average amount of sleep truck drivers get is shockingly low. According to one study, truck drivers averaged 5.18 hours in bed per day, but only 4.78 hours of verified sleep. That’s not enough. This chronic sleep deprivation has serious consequences, including impaired driving, slower reaction times, and increased risk of accidents. It’s clear that improving my sleep is not just about personal comfort but also about safety and well-being on the road. I want to create healthier sleep habits, like going to bed earlier and putting my phone down before going to bed. I know that if I can get better sleep, it will positively impact every area of my life.
As an overweight truck driver, I’m acutely aware of the dangers of sleep apnea. Having a friend recently diagnosed with it has made me even more conscious of my own health and sleep habits. I don’t want to end up relying on a CPAP machine to get through the night, so I’m further motivated to improve my own health and sleeping habits. It’s a wake-up call, reminding me that my health is too important to neglect.
This morning, at a roadside rest stop just west of Fort Worth, Texas, as I rinsed the proverbial cobwebs out of my hair and splashed my face with cool water, I started thinking about what the Bible says about sleep. The late morning hours found me struggling to shake off the remnants of a restless night’s sleep. The sun was already up, casting harsh rays that seemed to pierce through my tired eyes. Each step across the pavement felt like a mile walk just to reach the bathroom. With 90 degree heat beating down on me, I began cursing my poor sleep habits. It was ten AM when I finally managed to pull myself out of bed, having not fallen asleep until nearly 1 AM. The struggle with sleep had become all too familiar—a nightly battle that left me feeling drained and defeated before the day had even begun. The rest stop gave me a moment to reflect on my self and how I handle my thoughts mentally.
In my mind, I envision my thoughts and mental processes as a vast warehouse, with rooms, shelves, and windows. It’s a detailed and intricate space where I manage my thoughts, memories, and tasks. I even subscribe to the idea of mental boxes, where I can store memories and thoughts into specific compartments within my mental warehouse. But because I spend so much time managing this mental space, it takes time to shut it down. Thus, my nightly routine of closing windows, cleaning up the office space, and accessing the control panel. I imagine myself going through the process of locking up the warehouse for the night, turning off lights, and finally allowing myself to rest. I know by doing all of that, I’m not relaxing and am actually expending more mental energy. But I’m also neurodivergent, and sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn’t. My poor sleep habits have even impacted my own internal clock. As a habitual night owl, my tendencies to stay up late are now exacerbated to where I am up until usually 1 am.
As I reflected on these intricate details of my mental landscape, I couldn’t help but think about how they intersect with my struggles with sleep. The mental gymnastics I perform each night are a testament to the complexity of my mind, but they also highlight the challenges I face in achieving restful sleep.
Sleep isn’t just a mental or physical attribute to our health. It’s also a major part of our spiritual struggles. In scripture, we encounter numerous instances where sleep serves as a backdrop for profound spiritual encounters and moral lessons.
One notable instance is found in Mark 6:31, where Jesus advises his disciples, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.” This passage reflects Jesus’ recognition of the need for physical and mental renewal, even amidst the demands of ministry. Additionally, Psalm 127:2 affirms the significance of rest, declaring, “In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat—for he grants sleep to those he loves.” Here, rest is depicted as a divine gift, essential for sustaining and nourishing the body and soul. These passages underscore the biblical wisdom regarding the importance of balance, urging us to prioritize rest as a means of honoring both our physical well-being and our spiritual connection with the divine.
One of the most poignant moments involving sleep in the Bible is when Christ is in the Garden of Gethsemane, praying fervently as His disciples fall asleep. In Matthew 26:40-41, Jesus finds Peter, James, and John asleep and says to Peter, “So, could you not watch with me one hour? Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” This moment underscores the human struggle between spiritual vigilance and physical weakness. It’s a reminder that even with the best intentions, our physical limitations can sometimes hinder our spiritual commitments. It’s easy to see how my own struggles with sleep parallel this story—my intentions to be healthy and spiritually vigilant are often thwarted by my physical exhaustion and poor sleep habits.
This theme is echoed in another significant instance in the Old Testament. In the book of Genesis, we read about Jacob’s dream at Bethel in Genesis 28:10-19. As Jacob sleeps, he dreams of a ladder reaching to heaven, with angels ascending and descending on it. God speaks to Jacob in this dream, reaffirming His covenant and promises. This story shows that sleep can be a time of divine revelation and spiritual renewal, a moment when God communicates with us in profound ways. I started to wonder if my sleepless nights could also be moments of divine revelation, if I could use those times to seek God’s presence and find spiritual renewal.
In Acts 20:9-10, we find another story involving sleep. A young man named Eutychus falls asleep during Paul’s long sermon, and he falls from the third-story window. Paul goes down, embraces him, and miraculously brings him back to life. This event reminds us of the importance of staying spiritually awake and vigilant, but also shows the grace and mercy present even when we falter. Eutychus’ story is a powerful reminder that even in our moments of weakness, God’s grace is there to lift us up. It made me reflect on how I could find grace in my own sleeplessness, turning those frustrating hours into opportunities for spiritual growth.
Reflecting on these biblical stories about sleep, I start to see a pattern. If I’m awake and can’t sleep, maybe that’s an opportunity rather than a burden. Instead of lying in bed trying to force my mind to sleep with mental gymnastics, perhaps I should use that time to pray. If my mind is restless, seeking something to latch onto, why not let it latch onto God? This shift in perspective began to change the way I approached my sleepless nights. Instead of seeing them as wasted time, I started to view them as moments to connect with God.
I’ve realized that these sleepless moments can be a chance to deepen my connection with God. Instead of fighting against my sleeplessness, or trying to organize my mental warehouse, I can embrace it as a time for spiritual growth. When I wake up in the middle of the night, I can try to turn my thoughts to prayer, offering my worries and struggles to God. It’s a way to find peace and rest, not just for my body, but for my soul.
The sleepless nights also provide opportunities for prayer and spiritual reflection. When I lie awake, the opportunity to recite the Jesus Prayer: “Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner” is readily available. Repeating this simple yet profound prayer helps me focus my mind and find peace in God’s presence during other moments in the day, surely it can help when trying to sleep. It’s an easy way to quiet the mental chaos and turn my restless thoughts into moments of spiritual connection.
As I continue on this journey of physical and spiritual renewal, I am finding that these moments of wakefulness can be transformative. They are times when I can seek God’s presence, find comfort in His words, and align my heart with His will. It’s a reminder that every moment, even those we struggle with, can be an opportunity for spiritual growth and connection. My health journey is far from over, but I am learning to embrace each sleepless night as a chance to grow closer to God.
So, if you find yourself awake in the middle of the night, unable to sleep, I encourage you to try this approach. Instead of fighting against it, turn to prayer. Use that time to connect with God, to seek His guidance, and to find peace in His presence. It’s a way to transform a struggle into a blessing, to find rest for your soul even when your body is restless. Each sleepless night can be an opportunity for spiritual growth and connection, turning what seems like a burden into a profound blessing.
Until next time my friends, sleep well.
— Orthodox Trucker
Orthodox Trucker 
I’ve been using a CPAP for about 5 years now. It was horrible for the first couple of months as I got used to it, but I will say now it is extremely helpful, and the current generation of machines (mine is a Philips Dreamstation, which has been great) has a quiet but variable speed fan that won’t disturb you. I’m pretty overweight myself, but I also have narrow nasal passages, and sometimes erratic sleep schedules. I know you want to avoid the machine, but it can be very very helpful, and you’ll sleep more deeply when you do sleep, meaning even if you can only get 5 hours, they’ll be a better 5 hours than what you get now (and this helps with weight loss for all sorts of reasons). My father in law, who is skinny as a rail and walks 5 miles a day, also needs one, so it’s not necessarily something always associated with weight.
Solid advice on the night prayers though. When I do get insomnia, I sometimes pray through the small book of hours, or grab a psalter. Nothing quite like the quiet of the night for psalms.
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